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In this video, Mother Siluana (Vlad) talks about forgiveness, gentleness, humility, and living a simple life. Her inspiring words guide us toward true inner peace and joy, even in the face of daily struggles.
Mother Siluana reposed in the Lord on June 8th, 2021. Her ministry in the Romanian Orthodox Church is impressive. She was the abbess of the Convent of St. Silouan in Iasi, coordinator of the Training and Counseling Center “The Holy Archangels Michael and Gabriel” and through her many conferences she created a bridge between the young generation and the Orthodox Church in Romania.
Video source: doxologia.ro June 2nd, 2015, Iasi, Romania
Mother Silouana:
Remember how your grandparents, our grandparents, used to say: “Dam***… O, Lord, forgive me! Lord, forgive me!” They always said this. Maybe in a mechanical way, but they said it. So, before God, always, always, let us say: “Lord, forgive me!” Let us be aware: Did Rafaela upset you? Rafaela upsets everyone. So, what do we do? “Lord, forgive me!” ”Forgive me?? Well, she wronged me.” Yes, but what did I do? How did I react? That is my part. So, I clean my part of the soul.
When the water is clean, say the Holy Fathers, when you throw a stone in the water, a few ripples appear, and that’s it. But if the water is dirty, when you throw a stone in it, it stirs up, mud rises, and nothing is visible anymore. So, by cleansing the water of our soul, by constantly and repeatedly asking for forgiveness from God, that’s when the joy begins. I believe we all felt that extraordinary joy after our first confession. Yes, after a difficult confession, where there were things we never thought we’d ever tell anyone. Not because they were big… for the big ones, you kind of feel proud. Like, “I killed someone!” But when it’s those small, silly things, and you’re a gentleman or a lady, how do you confess all those tiny ridiculous things? What will the priest think of you? Well, that is purity. When we give all these to God, and then, constantly, we show them to God and cleanse ourselves.
The next step is purity through self-restraint. Purity comes for us beginners when we get dirty. The more attentive we are, then comes self-restraint. Self-restraint is a decision not to overindulge in what is pleasurable. So, for me to refrain from chocolate, I don’t start praying while eating chocolate. Because once you start, it’s over—you don’t even know when it’s gone. You say: “Well, this week is fasting-free week, then we start fasting, and when fasting begins, we will refrain!” Thank God for fasting; we will ‘refrain’ [from meat] with many vegan hamburgers. 🙂
The next step is gentleness. Now, here I struggle. But I also have a promise. God promised me that before I die, I will be meek. And the nuns, whenever they see me gentler, they say: “Are you feeling unwell, Mother?” 🙂 They prefer me not to be so gentle, but to stick around… I cried a lot because I would have loved people to say: “Do you know Mother Siluana? The gentle one…” Oh, how I would have liked that… I love meek people. Father Sofian was a gentle person; he was gentleness embodied. And I prayed a lot. And then I understood that meekness does not necessarily mean this manner of being that we call “gentle,” but it’s a way of being where we do not hurt. Not to hurt, but to comfort, and not hurt the other.
The only way to climb this step is to say: “Lord, teach me to be gentle. Lord, teach me to be gentle.” As it says: “Learn from Me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart.” Humility helps us be gentle. How to be humble? It is the hardest science. I know a technique; I will teach you now: to thank God. It is from the Fathers, not from me. I use it, and it is of great help. Whatever I do, however I am, no matter how pleased I am with myself or those around me, I direct my thoughts to God: “Lord, thank you, Lord!”
The second thing is to yearn for a simple life. Simple. Very simple. So, if you’re foolish, simple, foolish. It’s nice to be foolish, and sometimes it’s good to play the fool. Because you simplify yourself when you’re foolish. Being in your place… What is our place? Here I have a precise definition: it’s the place beneath my bottom. No one can take it from me. If the priest pushes me, I go there and occupy a place and that’s my place. So, what’s important is where your feet are, where your bottom is. That’s your place. Stand before God there. And thank Him: “Lord, how good it is that no one can take my place!”
When we are content in our place, we are amazed how we end up on softer and softer chairs. The more discontented and complaining we are about our place, the harder, more prickly, and more uncomfortable our chairs become. Because we reject ourselves. And God does not help us the moment we fight for our place. So, we talked about faith… Now, doing good… Mother, here it’s very simple. We do good and yet we are not happy. Why? Because we expect applause, we expect feedback, we expect gratitude. “Look at all I’ve done for you! Look at how much I’ve done for him!” This is not truly doing good. This is personal pleasure, doing good for self-gratification.
I’m doing it for myself if I don’t do the good that God is sending me to do. There’s yet another way of doing good that is worse than indifference: when someone does good for you without you asking for it, when you don’t need it, yet they do it anyway and… You know the story about those kids who helped an old lady cross the street? There were 10-15 kids… And the teacher asks, “Why did you all have to go?” And they say, “Well, she didn’t want to…” She didn’t want to cross the street, you see, but they helped her by force. When doing good, we should always consider if the other person truly needs it…
